Red Herring At Cherry Point As Described By An Activist
Abnormal,
adj. 1.
A Whatcom County business owner operating a “for profit” firm when he or
she could file as a non-profit, ask the City of Bellingham for a grant and make
some real money; 2. The condition of examining
the facts and thinking about them before blindly accepting the precepts of an
activist organization; especially an organization allegedly dedicated to
environmental causes.
Usage: Ann’s insistence on
proof that the red herring of Cherry Point actually are an endangered species was
seen as abnormal by fundraisers for the cause; after all, activist jobs would be lost if the fundraising effort were to fail and it's unfair and inappropriate to suggest a group dedicated to environmental activism should be required to demonstrate something so mundane as a factual basis for their beliefs.
Absurdity, n.
1. In Whatcom County, the concept of property rights; 2. A statement of
belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion (After Bierce).
Usage: Roger insisted on
retaining the notion that traditional concepts of property rights should be
part of the Growth Management discussion, a notion considered an absurdity by
Futurewise and its proponents.
Accountability, n.
1. An obscure term used in the early days of Bellingham and Whatcom
County to describe an important virtue required of those wishing to hold
positions of responsibility. 2. In
politics, a term applied to an opponent; but not to be misconstrued as having
any personal applicability.
Usage: Growth Management
Act? What’s that! Sure, it’s the law but I don’t see where we
have any accountability just because it's the law!
Activist, n. 1.
A citizen willing to do what he or she is told without question or
hesitation.
Usage: When Joe, long a
reliable, progressive activist willing to parrot the party line, suggested in
idle conversation that it could be possible new, and clean, uses for coal might
someday make the mineral acceptable, he was instantly labeled a Right Wing Tea Party Republican; forbidden to pass through doors of Whatcom Wins until he
either recanted publicly or, made a large, and untraceable, donation.
Modern Train As Described By A Bellingham Activist
Agricultural Land, n. 1. Land intended to assure the viewscape enjoyed
by passing bicyclists out on holiday from the city are never offended by the
intrusion of homes, animals pooping, or poorly dressed farmers on the natural
canvas the mother earth goddess, the Lady Whatcom, so generously provided for
the exclusive use of salmon.
Usage: Joe notified the Department of Ecology about
an emissions violation when he noticed a horse peeing within 300 yards of a
drainage ditch, demanding the animal be destroyed. Dismayed officials explained that in our
unenlightened age agricultural land entailed a right to farm thus, the only possible
remedy would a $3,000 fine accompanied by a requirement the horse be sternly instructed
not to repeat the offense.
Whatcom County Farm As Envisioned By Local Activists
Anarchy, n.
Conditions pertaining to the period of time when the opposing party has
gained power.
Usage: The elections of
2013 led to anarchy in Whatcom County.
The citizens of Whatcom County never noticed.
Atheist, n. 1. One who worships his or her god in
the mirror each time opportunity presents.
2. One who believes that some
things are right and some things are wrong but no thing, save the individual, has
the authority to establish which is which therefore, no thing is right and no
thing is wrong.
Usage: As an atheist believed in nothing nevertheless worked ceaselessly to assure others lived in strict
adherence to the atheist's own creed as codified by the atheist in both his own mind and in the strictures of county plans and code requirements.
Bell Curve,
n. 1.
A graphic representation of an individual’s standing in relationship to peers
in terms of intelligence, accomplishment or ability. 2. In
sociology, an unfair characterization of an individual’s standing in
relationship to peers in terms of intelligence, accomplishment or ability.
Usage: In failing to assure 100% of students attending public schools are in the
top 50% of their class as represented on a bell curve, the Bellingham School District is not living up to expectations of the District's helicopter parents.
